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Friday, October 03, 2003
...a Chesapeake....a yellow or black lab....oooh...a pug or Boston would be cute...preferably a male....just weaned................... Saturday, September 27, 2003
hellllllllllllooooo!! what a month this is turning into...thank god diana's dad is ok..she was so scared and u just wanted to do whatever it took to help her. britt as usual was no help at all...actually trusting me with the whole front while she delivered food.talk about being scared. but everything is ok..and thats what counts......... been thinking about nikki being in indidana and missing her.just want to call and go out to applebees...hope youre having a great new life there nik and remember we miss you.......... bought the dvd identity w/john cusack and um...oh whats his name..oh yeah...RAY LIOTTA....says theres supposed to be a new scene AND an alternate ending...but guess what!! THEY ARENT THERE!!!!!!! if anyone can tell me where they are id greatly appreciate it!!! by the way, I WANT A PUPPY .........STILL!!!! Thursday, September 11, 2003
woo..been kinda sick w/this damn cough.... dr gave me a scrip for some kind of potent cough syrup...and i DO believe its starting to kick in. i hope nikki and brian are settling in ok..gonna miss her! glad to NOT hear where anything bad happened today (so far...). this shit just has to stop. let's hope soon......... I WANT A PUPPY!!!! Saturday, August 30, 2003
I CAN'T BELIEVE I DID THAT.... .....bought the first season of ER on DVD...but i wanted it..it was cheaper than i expected........and i wanted it.... .....bought the ALIENS queen box set...it's really cool...she's wicked looking...but i wanted it...it was cheaper than i expected........and i wanted it.... .....bought a cheesecake...sara lee...w/strawberries...no comment.... .....ATE said cheesecake...(not ALL of it...geeez!)...i wanted to...in a real bad way.... ...Jeepers Creepers 2? you've GOT to be kidding.... oooh! check out the NEW BOONDOCK SAINTS web site...make sure u turn sound up, too. Tuesday, August 26, 2003
...it was in the news today. that scumbag owner of SUPERPETS apparently is selling very sick animals...rumor has it that the fire they had at the other pet store in that shopping center place (i can't remember!) was on purpose..imagine torching a bunch of helpless animals..that they let kids (u know..the ones w/the asshole parents that don't know what responsibility is) pick up anything and one actually dropped a puppy on it's head and killed it. be careful where u go...there are TOO MANY scumbag shithead store owners out there that have NO business being in the business. if they would only make stricter laws about that shit..but NOOOOOOO...we have to worry about important stuff like where the new HOOTERS is gonna go and how my kid NEVER does that!! Sunday, August 24, 2003
.........a dyslexic bank robber runs into a bank and yells..."AIR IN THE HANDS MOTHER STICKERS THIS IS A FUCK UP!" (hehehee) oh gosh...was i...~sniff~ missed? sorry guys. so busy and lets face it..my life is boring...but things are okeydokey and im hunkydorey. (uhum) just wish i was richybitchy! Thursday, August 14, 2003
 I'm sure it's no big surprise to you that your romance is The Princess Bride. A heartwarming tale of "Twue Wuve" that has giants, Spainards and swashbuckling. You really do think that love can overcome anything. You may be a touch naive but your heart is certainly in the right place. You've probably got one of those relationships where proper nouns have been replaced with "Snookums" and "Pookie Pie". Eww. Beware a cuteness overload. What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life? brought to you by Quizilla RRRRRRRRight................. Sunday, August 10, 2003
(shit...i'm the old one....) Gandalf A wandering spirit caring for a multitude of just concerns, you are an instrumental power in many of the causes around you. And so am I, very dangerous: more dangerous than anything you will ever meet, unless you are brought alive before the seat of the Dark Lord. Gandalf is a character from the Middle-Earth universe. TheOneRing.net has a description of him. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you enjoyed taking this survey and wish to help advertise it and your results, you can use the code below on your site. You are welcome to copy the image to your own Web space.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Would you like to see what other characters people have been matched with? Or take the survey again, perhaps? Thursday, July 31, 2003
HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!! when can i get some color on my blog like everybody else? HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!! why can't my cats change their OWN cat litter? i have to (clean my bathroom that is) HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!! why are people so friggin' MEAN lately? what's the problem? ain't gettin' any? dog ate your homework? too hot outside? WWAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! i feel for ya! quit trying out for dick-of-the-year! relax! you made it! HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!! where the fuck you think you're going nikki? don't you want to stay in wonderful, party-all-the-time illinois? we are gonna miss you... HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!! how come my lists aren't as good as diana's? i suppose you think you're better than me, huh? huh? HUH?? (sorry...pms) Wednesday, July 30, 2003
Thursday, July 24, 2003
by the way...never thought i'd say this...not a big johnny depp fan...but if you want a cheap thrill...go see PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN...depp is very...........nice. something about that hair..that outfit...that swagger....mmmmmmmm!! oh yeah...it was actually a good movie. guess what.I'M NOT DEAD! been so busy w/work and work and...oh yeah...work.......hope everyone is doing great. Mad Dog Kidd Part crazy, part mangy, all rabid, you're the pirate all the others fear might just snap soon. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr! Thursday, July 10, 2003
FIRST LET ME APOLOGIZE TO BRITT AND NIK...THEY WERE GONNA MEET ME AT PANERA'S IN PEORIA AND BRITT WAS FINALLY GONNA MEET JOHN...WORK SCREWED THAT UP. I'M SO SORRY GUYS.WAS HOPING TO GET THERE W/YA AND HAVE SOME FUN. AS FOR THUR...IT MUST'VE BEEN THE OFFICIAL ASSHOLE'S HOLIDAY. A WOMAN ALMOST HIT ME IN WAL MART'S PK LOT...THEN HONKED AT ME FOR WALKING IN FRONT OF HER CAR! PEOPLE WERENT FRIENDLY.THAT'S OK-ALWAYS ENJOYED HOLDING THE DOOR FOR YA AND YOU CAN'T SAY THANK YOU. MAYBE IF I SAID "FUCK YOU" YOU'D ACKNOWLEDGE ME? LET'S NOT LEAVE OUT ALL THE WAL MART PEOPLE.JUST WHERE IS THAT STORE ON TV THAT ADVERTISES WAL MART HEAVEN?IT AIN'T IN PEKIN! Thursday, July 03, 2003
THOUGHT MY NIECE WAS GONNA BE HERE W/ME THIS WEEKEND-BUT OTHER PEOPLE HAD OTHER PLANS. OH WELL, AT LEAST I GET TO SEE HER NEXT WEEKEND. I MISS HER. IT'S OFFICIAL-MY CAT BLACKJACK IS AN ASSHOLE. HEARD NIK WAS LEAVING-WE ALWAYS ASSUME WE'LL SEE PEOPLE-NOW I'M SORRY WE DIDN'T DO MORE TOGETHER. HOPE WE CAN GET TOGETHER AGAIN BEFORE YOU LEAVE, NIKKI. BRITT-IT'S SO AMAZING HOW FUNNY YOU ARE! NOW WHEN THE HELL ARE YOU GONNA MEET ME FOR LUNCH IN PEORIA SO YOU CAN MEET JOHN!? I GET THE FEELING PEOPLE HAVE BEEN LOOKING AT MY TRUCK REAL FUNNY-LIKE.......WELL YOU GO RIGHT AHEAD AND LOOK! MY OTHER VEHICLE IS A.........FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION. Friday, June 27, 2003
busy busy busy! my niece is up and we're going to 6-flags!woo hoo! what fun! i got my first raise on my new job-only six months and it was a good one-took friggin waldens about THREE Years to give me the same amount.gee, why doesn't anyone want to work for that company?! one of my cats got INTO the dragon's aquarium-luckily it didn't get hurt.just wait til that lizard is big enough to take a bite-i'd pay to see that! hope everyone is ok.glad your mom is better britt-hope you like your new job nik (miss you guys-when can we go out again-maybe closer to end of july?)have to say i was looking forward to you being at video store-we could talk more. it's too friggin hot out-i don't like summer as much as spring and fall AND winter. Sunday, June 22, 2003
I WAS BEING SILLY.......  Jordan Which Futurephobia Character Are You Most Like? brought to you by Quizilla Sunday, June 15, 2003
i wish i was a cartoon character-that way no matter what happens you're still ok. i think i'd like to be pepe le pew-he doesn't know he stinks and thinks everybody loves him (at least the cats he mistakes for other skunks). he's a generally happy.......guy. Wednesday, June 11, 2003
ENOUGH ALREADY WITH THE DISNEY MAIL!!! why do they think i might be interested? who put me on the list? CUT IT OUT!! I......DON'T.....WANT.....ANY!!!! Sunday, June 08, 2003
"You know, I'm just a regular guy who grew up with the posters of these guys on my wall...and now I'm one of them! That's right, I'm standing here, living proof that if you work hard enough, and you want it bad enough..dreams do come true. So follow your dreams...." "You're an interesting species, an interesting mix. You're capable of such beautiful dreams and such horrible nightmares. You feel so lost, so cut off, so alone, only you're not. See, in all our searching, the only thing we've found that makes the emptiness bearable is each other." "Can you imagine what it feels like to be alive for thousands of years, and then realize you're actually going to die, 'cause some self-righteous cop decided that he was going to save the fucking world?" went to britt's birthday party (the sat night one) at diana's-these people are so cool! everyone was so nice and made me feel welcome-i brought my dog since i walked just down the alley from my house to theirs-he was a hit! fed ate up all the attention, constantly picked on poor gus (what a cutie-sorry about the target practice, gus-thank god he missed!) and i found out my dog loves beer! i had a great time-thanks diana! once again-HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRITT! hope you remember SOMETHING from the party! Friday, June 06, 2003
did you know that if you go on a talk show...say MAURY...and go on about how bubba or tyrone or whatever his /their name is IS the father of your baby /babies AND actually have the guts/stupidity to take NOT ONE, NOT TWO, but THREE OR MORE different dna tests and they ALL come out as NOT being the daddy, and lets say you cry and carry on about how (sniff) rough it is being a single mother, and THEN you say how now you know who the REAL father is...you a slut. now if you are one of those goobers that actually gets in front of a camera and calls his "ex" a whore and a slut, etc. and that just "ain't my kiiiid" and how she slept w/your best friend/brother/uncle while your mommy is saying the same thing (like you're a prize and a virgin before you met the "ex")...you aren't much better. i SO MISS afternoon television!! Wednesday, June 04, 2003
your kidding,right? so what this is REALLY saying is...i'm a slutty dingbat who is self-centered and runs a brothel? if this is true, WHERE'S MY MONEY? Tuesday, June 03, 2003
Sunday, June 01, 2003
by the way, most of my archives have disappeared. just in case someone out there just HAS to read everything, they're gone!! i'm sure britt has another smartass excuse for me. Saturday, May 31, 2003
BOOBIES IS THE FUNNIEST WORD FOR...WELL, YOU KNOW...BUT HOOTERS IS THE SECOND FUNNIEST. hey, I didn't make these up...... just chased a freakin' neighbor's cat-got away w/what i think was a baby bird-one of the other birds (probably a parent) is STILL out there all upset. everyone who knows me knows how much i love these animals, but i could just ring that f**ker's neck. f**kin' owners who make excuses for letting their pets run around to get pregnant, maimed, killed, whatever-stop making excuses! also-i keep hearing a cell phone tone on the tv (i hope)-the very same tone that was heard in jurassic park 3-when it was swallowd by the big-ass dino and you heard it before he attacked everyone.crreeeepy! went to peoria to check out the new mall-like walking thru perfectville. as usual all the shops were for skinny-ass chicks, people w/weird tastes in clothes (and furniture) and wealthy people. i guess i'm a low-end kinda person. a lot of the people weren't exactly friendly, either. i had to check out borders (against my better judgement) and there was my old boss, rita. don't you hate it when people joke around w/you, and while they're making smartass comments to you that MAY be little digs you're not sure if they're SERIOUS? that't exactly what she was doing-hey howdy THAT was fun! Thursday, May 29, 2003
no, i did NOT "get eaten" as nikki put it (hehehe)-i couldn't find the source. but speking of scary stuff, i got an email that asks..."who DOESN'T love disney!?"...ME. "who WOULDN'T like a $100 gift certificate to the disney store!?"...ME. Wednesday, May 28, 2003
hmm...just heard a noise in my basement. sounded like something fell over...or was PUSHED. i, not being one of those stupid bimbos that will descend into the bowels of said dark and damp underground for such a reason as this, WILL consider such an adventure only if there's a good f**kin' reason. now unless ray or vin (or one or two other certain someones) happen to call my name from that same direction, the only OTHER reason i would have to delve into that subterranean pit of uncertainty....would be for laundry. just what exactly could make such a noise? taking cat inventory, i see that everyone is present and accounted for. the chin is asleep, the hamster, too. the dragon is also settling down, and the dog is just too nervous to EVER creep downstairs. maybe it was the occasional bat that finds its way inside, sometimes making it upstairs, causing quite an uproar until it is caught and released outside. if this is the case, it certainly must be a BIG one, for the noise i heard was a LOUD one. and so i must make my way downstairs, just to quell the uncertainty in my mind. please keep in mind...if you should NEVER hear from me again, movies don't lie. someone really WAS down there, waiting for me...and it wasn't you-know-who. it was you-know-what. Monday, May 26, 2003
saw BRUCE ALMIGHTY last night-HILARIOUS! i loved it! definately funnier than i expected. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN? in the women's bathroom, there is, you know, where someone MISSED on the toilet seat. someone please tell me...how the f**k do you get some on the seat? i realize guys miss all the time-even though they just aim and shoot-but how does some chick do it? is the seat too low? are you nervous? are you in a hurry?WTF??? Sunday, May 25, 2003
"C'MON FEEL THE NOISE".....i believe someone may be having a grad party behind me-music's loud but good, although the dj could not STOP THE FUCKING SONG BEFORE IT'S DONE PLAYING!! there's a cool radio station that plays bob and tom and then older rock-they are always doing the same thing and it makes me crazy. Wednesday, May 21, 2003
mmmmmm...i'm craving...chocolate, pepsi, a rare steak, a long intimate cuddle with someone who shall remain nameless, the perfect campfire, a puppy, a kitten (don't even go there, diana), a great laugh with my friends, a wonderfully scary make-me-scream (really) movie, wonderful make-me-scream (definately) sex, a long hot bath, a steaming cup of hot tea, a margarita, a jeep, an end to all this bullshit fighting, justice, a great book that keeps me up all night, willpower, a comfortable dreamless (at least BAD dreams) sleep, a cuddle from my cats, the look of a genuine chaps-wearing-jeans-tight cowboy as he walks past me, a steady rain in 75 degree weather, a wink from said cowboy, sweetened ice tea, chips and sour cream dip, bazooka bubble gum, a whole DAY at the movies, north carolina, the look of a chaps-wearing-tight-jeans biker as he sits astride his harley or harley-looking machine...................... hmmmmmmmm...someone's having a birthday soon and i forget who it is. oh well, i'm sure it's not that big a deal. Monday, May 19, 2003
my computer hates me. everytime i try to go to nik's or britt's or diana's blog it takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r. i guess it could be worse-if this were a stephen king novel my computer would come to life and hurt me in a real bad way. ~shudder~ Sunday, May 18, 2003
HA!! isn't the word "boobies" funny? who ever thought of THAT one? hhhmmmmm-guess what?! i and some of my friends (females, of course) have BOOBIES!!! HA!! i guess that's no worse than "knockers"-who would've thought a guy could come up with such wonderful descriptions!! GOOD NEWS!! i can get a free issue of the disney magazine AND a $100 gift certificate to the disney store!!! what to do...what to do... OH! i know....NOTHING. by the way, elvis is STILL dead...mickey mouse is NOT a real...whatever, and star trek is not THE definition of sci fi-now mystery science theatre 3000, that's a whole different story!!! TOM SERVO RULES!!! Saturday, May 17, 2003
RENT THIS MOVIE!! BUY IT!! EQILIBRIUM with Christian Bale. it's a great story and GREAT fight scenes, better than the MATRIX! make sure you get the dvd so you can watch the fight scenes again-check out the first one in slow motion-quite cool. did you REALLY miss me? i've been so busy at work and too freakin' tired to get on computer lately-hope everyone is having a great week-i'm off to watch the PREAKNESS-(unfortunately from my livingroom). okay, nik, insult me!! i look forward to those!! GIDDYUP!!! Monday, May 12, 2003
ah, spring! so glad nikki wasn't hurt in that storm-not to mention the critters. i made it home just in time for the sirens to go off. poor fed stayed in the bathtub (it's his "safe" place). we were all lucky. at least we don't have the earthquakes like california does. yuck!! Wednesday, May 07, 2003
ATTENTION BRITT!!! i want to change stuff on my blog. i am officially putting in a workorder; please let me know when we can work on this...if you don't mind. you know i love you, don't you? this is it-one more thing then i'm off to do my chores....... ANYONE WHO ATTEMPTS ANY INDECENT BEHAVIOR TOWARDS A CHILD SHOULD BE PUNISHED. ANYONE WHO SUCCEEDS IN SAID ATTEMPT SHOULD BE SHOT ON SIGHT. THERE SHOULD BE SOMEONE JUST A PHONE CALL AWAY WHO COMES WHEN CALLED, CARRYING A BASEBALL BAT AND A GUN, AND READY TO USE EITHER ONE. I'M SO TIRED OF HEARING ABOUT SOME PERVERT, OR ASSHOLE THAT CAN'T HANDLE HIS "PROBLEM" AND RESORTS TO MURDER. WHAT'S EVEN WORSE IS THAT THE "RIGHTS" OF THIS PERSON ARE SO IMPORTANT. PLEASE-IF IT'S OBVIOUS THEY DID IT, IF THEY CONFESS, IF THEY WERE CAUGHT WHILE DOING IT, WHO GIVES A SHIT ABOUT RIGHTS? THERE'S TOO MUCH OF THIS SHIT GOING ON. THERE. MY RANT FOR THE WEEK. P.S.ANIMAL ABUSERS SHOULD GET THE SAME TREATMENT. OOOH-I FEEL LIKE SUCH A BITCH (WATCH IT BRITT...NIKKI; I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING). The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to the First Level of Hell - Limbo! Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Take the Dante's Inferno Test APPARENTLY I'M IN LIMBO-AT LEAST I'M NOT A BIMBO!! I WOULDN'T MIND KNOWING A HIMBO.... Tuesday, May 06, 2003
why is it that people who drive jaguars think they're soooo cool? that has to be one of the ugliest cars on the planet, yet joe cool gets an attitude whenever he's behind the wheel. (no, i'm NOT jealous, they really ARE ugly) why do some people NOT work when they should be working and get away w/it, yet others who try hard and make mistakes get all the shit thrown at 'em? when is britt gonna help me improve my blog? when am i gonna become a funny, enlightening and overall can't-stand-to-NOT-read-her-blog person? does britt still have that "problem"? yes, i can truely say she does. nik can vouch for me. THE BORDERS CORP. HAS ONCE AGAIN SHOWN HOW MUCH IT APPRECIATES ITS EMPLOYEES. NOT EVEN A MONTH'S NOTICE ON THE CLOSING IN PEKIN. EVERYONE THERE IS BETTER OFF-DON'T LET NIK OR BRITT FEEL BAD ABOUT IT-YOU HAVE A NEW JOB NIK AND BRITT YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!! HOPEFULLY SANDI WILL FIND SOMETHING EVEN BETTER-KAREN AND JANET AND DORIS ARE ALL OK-GOOD LUCK EVERYONE. Sunday, May 04, 2003
stupid things i saw/heard today, which shall be forever-more called "dumbass sunday"..... .....an elderly woman in andy's restaurant told her daughter (quite loudly) "i'm sick and tired of the way you treat me" .....a car waiting for my parking space at wal-mart held up traffic all the way back to the edge of the lot so they could have my parking space .....a woman came around the corner aisle and almost ran into me; i said "excuse me" and she just ignored me (i also believe i got "the look" from her)-obviously it was MY fault for being there-DAMN ME!! .....the neighborhood strays are eating the food i put out. i thought that was the owner's job, but of course, they are complete failures as owners; otherwise these animals would not be in my yard all the time (and making more strays) .....the scooby-doo movie. i'm just waiting for arachnaphobia to start (did i spell that right?) neato things that ALSO happened today which make "dumbass sunday" a not so bad day..... .....two robins were fighting-it's breeding season and love is in the air! .....pez (my chinchilla) has the run of the living room (i'm cleaning carpets later) and i think he's driving the cats crazy...hehehehe .....it's raining!! .....my dog was glad to see me when i came home .....i've got an unopened, quite large bottle of mexican tequila that someone at work gave me (he's from mexico and a super nice guy)-one of these days..... .....it's quiet and i love it!! Saturday, May 03, 2003
IT'S DERBY DAY!!! time to see what famous people who have probably never SEEN a horse before get great seats, wear those big-ass hats and sip mint julips while they schmooze w/the rich. i'd LOVE to go to Churchill Downs for DERBY DAY (!)-i actually sent for info-apparently you have to wait for an INVITATION to get tickets-ain't that a bitch! however you CAN go down, purchase tickets at the gate (hehehe-the gate, get it?) and work your way to the front. i could handle that. the really weird part is, we were there once, just to see it-it's actually (at least about 10 years ago) in the middle of the slums. SERIOUSLY!! they don't show THAT on tv. OH BOY!! race is starting. Thursday, May 01, 2003
"Oh, I'm a perp? You see a young brother in the back of a police car, automatically I'm a perp. Look at my suit, look at my tie. What do I look like, the fuckin' Crip's accountant? Look at this badge, bitch. Check out the gun!" "I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar." Monday, April 28, 2003
saw "IDENTITY" yesterday-loved it! it was nice to see a creepy movie-and it certainly didn't hurt to have John Cusack and Ray Liotta (embarrassing drool) in it. GO SEE IT! i may go again if britt and nik want to go. isn't it weird how much being scared can be so much fun? Sunday, April 27, 2003
britt's play was COO-EL! i didn't even recognize her. i highly recommend to anyone to go and see her perform when you can. i took drama in high school and was TERRIBLE! it amazes me how someone can get up in front of people and do that. so britt-when are you gonna go to hollywood? i want to be your personal assistant-you HAVE to treat me good, tho. no diva shit! Wednesday, April 23, 2003
at the urging of britt and by example of diana, here's my list of why i'm in a good mood (or should be soon).... 1)my boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to "say" goodnite. believe me when i say, i HIGHLY recommend it! (hehehehe) 2)my money problems are slowly working out. 3)my animals LOVE me! 4)i LOVE my new job-the people there (most, anyway) are so nice and fun to work with. i still miss working w/nik and janet and doris and what's her name...oh yeah, britt.(hehehehe) 5)i'm generally healthy (need to work on a couple things) and feel thankful for that. 6)hopefully get to see britt in her play sat, and ray liotta and john cusack in "identity" sun. britt needs to become famous SOON so we can visit her on set! 7)did i mention my late night.....oh, i did. sorry. Sunday, April 20, 2003
i've decided to GO FOR IT! what is IT? well, i haven't decided THAT, yet. it's official; my chinchilla's name is PEZ. why PEZ? because he is a PEZ dispenser of poop pellets. sorta like a rabbit, only smaller. HEY! how come MY blog never gets on the "feel like browsing" page of blogger? i browsed, and i have to say that some of those blogs aren't that great. a lot of 'em don't even give you the option to comment. there's a dog show on animal planet right now. watching these guys, how can you NOT like a dog? if you don't like dogs, you're just not human! elvis is alive and is working as a greeter at a wal mart somewhere down south. speaking of wal mart, just WHERE exactly is this store we always see on tv? if the ones around here (especially pekin) were that friendly and happy, i'd suspect great drugs, not a dedication to customer service. Wednesday, April 16, 2003
Friday, April 11, 2003
WELL, IT'S OFFICIAL! THEY'RE GONNA DRILL IN THE ARCTIC REFUGE (DOESN'T REFUGE MEAN "WE WON'T LET ANYONE LIVE HERE BUT THE ANIMALS "?) PEOPLE ARE SUCH HYPOCRITES! DON'T BITCH ABOUT THAT TERMITE INFESTATION NEXT TIME, DICKHEAD! NOT FUN IS IT? WHY IN THE WORLD DO PEOPLE THINK THAT MAN IS THE ONLY WORTHY LIVING THING ON THE PLANET? WE'VE FUCKED UP SO MUCH (AND WE'VE DONE GREAT THINGS, TOO, BUT NOT ENOUGH!), YOU'D THINK WE'D LEARN! ALIENS DON'T WANT TO COME HERE, WE MESS UP EVERYTHING! IF THEY DID DECIDE TO VISIT, IT WOULD PROBABLY BE TO WIPE US ALL OUT BECAUSE OF ALL THE SCREWUPS. GET RID OF US SO THEY COULD DO SOMETHING...UH OH, SOUNDS FAMILIAR DOESN'T IT?! ...AND NOW RUSSELL CROWE GOT MARRIED. FIRST IT WAS RAY, AND THANKS TO BRITT I CAN FORGET ABOUT VIN (WAY TO GO HEATHEN DUMPSTER BITCH!!), NOW RUSSELL. THAT'S OK, I WAS TIRED OF HIM ANYWAY! Thursday, April 10, 2003
britt and nikki and i are gonna watch PUMPKINHEAD this sat! actually, nikki and i are gonna watch britt watch PUMPKINHEAD....she don't know WHAT she's just got herself into. heheheheHEHEHEHEH anytime after 5 ok w/you, nik and britt? i'll bring pepsi and microwave popcorn. be very afraid, britt. hehehehehehehHEHEHEHEHEHEH Wednesday, April 09, 2003
after listening to bob and tom this morning going ON AND ON about the golf tournament in georgia (the masters?), i must say this (sorry if it offends anybody, but this is KIM'S blog)-golf is a senseless "sport". you have OTHER people cart your shit around, you DRIVE around in little carts, you take up ACRES of prime land that could be used for, say, HOMELESS people or (GASP!!) an actual nature PRESERVE. sure you have great "athletes"-(i heard tiger woods is a real ass-hole to people now that he's a millionaire.) if you feel the need to hit something, take up baseball (even I can follow that, and it's FUN! you can be noisy!!); enlist in the service so they can use people like you to knock the shit out of the enemy! (if you're THAT good, you won't miss!!) if you like the scenery, go to our national parks (the ones SOME ASSHOLES are trying to fuck up in the name of beloved OIL) and take a nice long walk. oh yeah, and carry a backpack. don't have someone else do it. golf-yuck! Sunday, April 06, 2003
"But if you do one day you will look behind you and you will see we three, and on that day you will reap it." "I don't like Bull Riders...They're little men with big egos. Besides, he's got one of them skinny butts like the rest of em'." "What is it about you that makes a man with a hundred forty-seven I.Q. feel like a dribbling idiot?" "To be a good soldier you must love the army. To be a good commander you must be able to order the death of the thing you love." "Unfortunately I couldn't give an 'A' to your papers because of the paragraph you wrote which I was unfortnate to memorize: "Cell's are bad. My uncle lives in a 'Cell' in which he only has a magazine to read and the same lousy food to eat. THE END"!!" "You almost had me? You never had me - you never had your car. . . Granny shiftin' not double clutchin' like you should. You're lucky that hundred shot of NOS didn't blow the welds on the intake! Now me and the mad scientist gotta rip apart the block, and replace the piston rings you fried." "One: never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two: take it outside. Never start anything inside unless it's absolutely necessary. And three: be nice." Saturday, April 05, 2003
hey! when do i get cute illustrations on my blog?! when can i add cute comments instead of "shout outs"?! should i color my hair like britt does; maybe a lavender or hot pink?! when can i go see the new vin diesel movie?! it's probably not that great story-wise, but i'm sure the bicept/ass ratio is pretty high! by the way, britt-back off the man or i'll have to open up a can of whoop-ass on ya! (ooh, i feel so...so...dr evil-ish!) OMG!!! i can't believe it (people who know me WILL believe it)...i brought home a new baby tonite. a chinchilla! i couldn't help it! urs said he'd been to two different homes and he was in need of affection, etc. etc. (no chris, i'm not naming him coat or liner!). he's soo soft and cuddly,altho i haven't actually cuddled w/him yet. he's getting used to everyone in the house. i still need to name him-chi chi comes to mind, but i want to watch him and see if he does something that'll help me name him (like maybe eats-dog's-face-off or cat-killer-EWWWWWW-hope nothing like that happens). Thursday, April 03, 2003
busy busy busy! hope nik has a good time camping, britt has a safe time at nik's house, and vin FINALLY calls this weekend. HA! see what booze does to your brain? Sunday, March 30, 2003
WANNA SEE SOMETHING SCARY? GO TO: http://bbs.slate.msn.com/ THERE ARE SOME SCARY PEOPLE OUT THERE-CHECK OUT "TO ALL MUSLIMS" AND "JESUS IS LORD" (I MADE SOME COMMENTS UDER BLUEPANTHER) AND YOU'LL UNDERSTAND THE NEED FOR BETTER BIRTH CONTROL PRACTICES. Saturday, March 29, 2003
i've been checking out other blogs (i'm curious)-how come half of 'em don't have any way to post? are they so sure their rants are so important that no one can comment? that's half the fun! heard about how georgia is going on about their state flag? how a school in mississippi is in turmoil over kids wearing the rebel flag on clothes? the sad part in THAT (besides the obvious) is that the kids have gotten over the issue, but the parents are protesting! (all of this according to bill mahr) some people need a hobby. what ya'll think? MY COMPUTER IS AGAINST ME! THINGS ARE MISSING ON MY BLOG, I KEEP GETTING ERRORS ON PAGES AND IT LOCKED UP ON MY FAVORITE SCREEN SAVER, SO NOW I'LL HAVE TO DELETE IT! ALL YOU PEOPLE WHO ARE SOOO GOOD WITH COMPUTERS...@#^%$(&&)^^$#)_(+_&%&$@*&^$(!!! Thursday, March 27, 2003
"The only true currency in this bankrupt world...is what you share with someone else when you're uncool." if saddam isn't watching the news channels to see what our forces are doing he SHOULD be. there's more info going out than what you will read in future books! just ANOTHER reason to keep the press away!i would LOVE to see a grieving family member kick someone's ass for asking a stupid question-wonder if they'd show THAT on tv?! PLEASE TELL ME.......why don't cops give tickets to people who drive too slow? some bimbo in the passing lane today felt the need to go about 55 down 474-you should have seen the guy in the passenger seat-he looked SO embarassed!! .....why won't my poor neighbor's deadbeat-ain't-got-a-job-don't-know-what-birth-control-is-for relatives stop leeching off of her? if YOU'RE a leecher YOU SUCK! (hehe-pun) it's selfish and you're probably in some way or another contributing to that person's death! .....why can't chocolate be non-fattening, a brand new truck (or jeep) VERY inexpensive, my job be less stressful, and a nice check in the mail from a long lost relative that feels I matter!? .....why do a lot of places (wal-mart and my bank!) think that EVERYBODY wants to see the news channels and watch stuff on the war while you shop or bank? HELLO!! if i wanted to watch it i'd turn on my own friggin' tv. stop shoving it down my throat! .....if they're all for peace and not war, why the hell are they fighting the police while protesting? shut the fuck up, stand BEHIND your country AND the people who are fighting over there, and we can all discuss it when it's over! .....why can't i drink all the margaritas i want and NOT get wasted? .....why does my cat simon (the one that looks like he's always high) have to play in the litter like he's at the beach? sometimes i think he's about to build a sandcastle. .....why can't you get your money back when you see a movie and it sucks? .....how can i be like britt and diana and be FUNNY? ..... Monday, March 24, 2003
oh yeah, by the way...CNN SUCKS! they are NOW getting interviews from the homes of some of the families of the captured soldiers in iraq. THAT'S why i never got into journalism (i was good in school-won awards and stuff...yeah yeah so what)-how can you ask a grieving person what it feels like to lose a loved one? that is NOT reporting!! they also showed one of the pow's giving his name while at the same time SAYING THEY WEREN'T GOING TO SHOW THE TAPE! let's not forget the picture of the dead bodies-you couldn't see the faces but you COULD see arms and a leg. and of course they also talked to the pow's mother while the tape was running. JUST REPORT WHAT'S HAPPENING AND LEAVE IT AT THAT! THE CONSTANT MORBID CURIOSITY SEEKERS SHOULD BE DENIED ANY AND ALL ACCESS TO THIS STUFF. there. enough said. isn't the rain WONDERFUL!!?? OOOH! IT'S RAINING OUTSIDE AND IT SMELLS GREAT! ILOVETHISWEATHER!!! now if only the neighbors would SHUT THE F**K UP!! Sunday, March 23, 2003
RANDOM THOUGHTS (not as good at this as diana!)..... .....the OSCARS are on tonite! let's hope there won't be interruptions and some hollywood hotshot doesn't decide to pull an "i hate my country " bullshit to make a point. just be happy and thankful! .....it's a BEAUTIFUL day out and i'm taking the dog for a swim. i just hope he doesn't almost drown like the LAST time we went. .....DREAMCATCHER wasn't as scary as i'd hoped. jason lee is ALWAYS good (kept expecting jay and silent bob to show up), and the movie gods relied on special effects (creatures) too much. they WERE kinda neat, tho; lots of teeth! .....things sound a little worse across the globe, but just keep in mind that not too long ago people were dying by the 1000's. .....saw a stray cat out front; i think it might be pregnant. thanks a lot dickhead for bringing MORE strays into our neighborhood. maybe you should cut down on the beer and pizza and pay-per-view of wwf and have your pets spayed and/or neutered! .....there's SOMETHING about a guy in leather chaps sitting back on his bike (harley's are the best, but i've seen some nicely put together foreign ones) that just makes me think..ooooh yeah. (i think of a few other things but i'll keep that to myself.) .....why can't they make CHOCO-DERM or CHOCO-RETTE? (i guess that should be choco-BAR since rette stands for a cigarette;get my drift?)-i'd be willing to try it! .....have a GREAT DAY everyone!! Thursday, March 20, 2003
GOOD THINGS... this weather is great! everything smells good. all my pets...no matter how much i want to kill them sometimes. movies! few things can beat sitting back and watching a great movie that takes you away. CHICAGO, SAVING GRACE (SO funny), OLD SCHOOL (yes, it was actually FUNNY, too!); just a few. friends...can never have TOO MUCH fun with 'em!! time goes by too fast. chocolate and pepsi...trust me. mother nature...don't be greedy, everybody!! restful sleep in a comfortable, warm bed. NO sleep in a comfortable, warm bed with "the one." birds outside my window...especially a new sound i'm not used to. it means they LOVE my "table." a heart-racing, breath-stealing scary movie. SO HARD to find (slasher movies DON'T count!). AND SO IT BEGINS.... let's just say be nice to each other and be thankful you live where you live. with all the shit we complain about over here, at least we're protected. one thing we don't have to worry about is being thrown out to the "wolves" by our own kind. Sunday, March 16, 2003
one more thing before i log off...why do we have to make rules about pollution and environmental laws? could it be because some rich, greedy assholes want more money and people with power can do just about anything they want? why can't we enforce these laws? why are they always being messed with because ANOTHER greedy asshole wants it changed? this is the same mentality you see with a lawyer that ACTUALLY took the case of the woman who burned herself with mc donald's coffee and WON!!! not to mention the idiot judge that heard the case. why is our legal system wasting time w/such morons? here's an idea...if the person did it..admits to it..is caught in the middle of it..why give them a trial? who gives a shit about their rights? they don't care about their VICTIM'S rights. it's sad that a large-scale farm can't keep from polluting a nearby river, that the army is gonna burn up some chemical weapons they can't use, that our guys in washington are gonna go ahead and drill for oil in an established wildlife refuge (who gives a shit about wildlife? we need that oil!!), that people have to physically put themselves in front of harms way to prove a point (greenpeace doesnt count-you're way too radical-it's almost like you think you need a martar-which makes you all the more redundant-sort of like the caterpillar union-it's ok to hurt others, as long as you get what you want), or that reporters make little "jabs" about how a war in iraq may affect birds that migrate. oooh, let's make fun of the ornithologists. (bet you never even knew how to spell it til you looked it up). at what point did we start to think we were the ONLY good thing on this planet? wake up.stop being so selfish. if you don't think it's important, that the only TRUE adventure is down to the local starbucks and back home, then what a pathetic waste of life you are. "And who are you? So full of hate that you have to fight everybody, because you've been whipped and chased by hounds. Well that might not be living, but it sure as hell ain't dying. And dying's been what these white boys have been doing for going on three years now, dying by the thousands, dying for you, fool." "They're probably watching me. Well, let them. Let them see what kind of a person I am. I'm not even going to swat that fly. I hope they *are* watching. They'll see. They'll see and they'll know, and they'll say, "Why, she wouldn't even harm a fly . . ." " "And I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do the trick," so, I curtailed my Walpoling activities, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!" "Women like cuddly toys don't they? They like to hug them and squeeze them and poke their eyes out and rip their fuckin' limbs off. I avoid confrontation I know it.. But if you grew up in Glasgow in the 1970's you'd avoid confrontation too. All I want is an easy life. I want to grow some vegetables, smoke some reefer, sing some carols at Christmas time and who knows one day Id like to be a Dad and raise a couple of calm fuckin' children. But that's it, I've had it I've fuckin' had enough. I'm going. No more Mr. cuddly toy. I'm not hanging around here to be the Whipping boy for Ganja Grace and Captain Nicky the fuckin' lobster queen." "Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should." "Now it is you, my best beloved one. You will be the blood of my blood, kin of my kin. I need your blood. I need." WHAT THE **** ARE THEY THINKING?..... ----a porche that can go 200 miles an hour...WHY would you want to go 200 miles an hour unless someone was trying to kill you (or hurt you reeeeeeeal bad) ----botox...let's see; you inject something like THE PLAGUE or some other deadly disease into your skin (making it NUMB??) so you look younger? (a mortician can do that, too) ----reality tv...c'mon, do i even need to SAY IT? the only time you should have ever eaten bugs (not that THAT was a good thing) was when you were a kid and you did stupid-kid-stuff like listening to another kid. ----more stupid-kid-stuff like calling french fries freedom fries or french toast freedom toast because the french don't agree w/"us". i thought we were all about freedom of speech, rights of people, etc.? let's take the serious stuff serious and leave the petty BULLSHIT at home. PLAY NICE OR YOU'RE GONNA GET A TIME-OUT. ----cancelling the shows i liked (freaky links and lone gunmen) and keeping the bad stuff (paid programs where you get two hours of get-rich-quick schemes or 500 original hits from the 50's, or bradley basketball INSTEAD of law and order). ----breeding one kind of dog or cat (or whatever their sicko little minds can come up with) with a totally different kind of dog or cat.WHY? leave genetics alone-it's too much like the OTHER breeding that's gone on with OTHER species. so you got a degree-do something GOOD with it. Saturday, March 15, 2003
FINALLY! i got my copy of BOONDOCK SAINTS!!it's mine, all mine...i won't have to borrow anyone's anymore!! Thursday, March 13, 2003
update on the "cat show"...apparently someone was on the fridge today. i'm scared. by the way, i'm pretty sure britt is THE ONE who REALLY stinks. hmmm...i wonder if i should get something pierced? you know, what we talked about, nikki. i think it would come in handy...i found a sunflower kernel today that i THOUGHT i'd dropped-sure would've been handy then! Wednesday, March 12, 2003
have you ever caught one of your cats staring at you; you can only imagine what they're thinking about. have you ever "caught " them in some kind of huddle and they all freeze when you come into the room like you just caught them doing something bad? they either stare at you to see what you're going to do, or they calmly scatter, probably to meet up at some other place to plan your "accident." nikki isn't the only one getting flipped off! but mine is a bit different. a woman nearkly ran me into the side of pekin bridge this morning...a guy in the car either directly behind me or to my left and behind me passed me afterwards and flipped her off! he knew how i felt! i've come to the conclusion that dvds are evil.....why must i have so many? do you ever imagine you see something out of the corner of your eye? like maybe some kind of bug or something that's moving? then you're scared into screaming and react just enough to make it look like you're losing your mind before you realize it was just your imagination and a trick of the eyes. it's the voices that are the warning sign...... Monday, March 10, 2003
Friday, March 07, 2003
Thursday, March 06, 2003
"You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste. Good nutrition has given you some length of bone, but you're not more than one generation from poor white trash, are you, Agent Starling? And that accent you've tried so desparately to shed? Pure West Virginia. What's your father, dear? Is he a coal miner? Does he stink of the lamp? You know how quickly the boys found you... all those tedious sticky fumblings in the back seats of cars...while you could only dream of getting out... getting anywhere... getting all the way to the FBI." "No? Okay, then shut your piehole and listen to me when I say that I am FINISHED with the checking-of-the-bags CONVERSATION!" "You don't frighten us, English pig dogs! Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person! I blow my nose at you, so-called "Arthur King," you and all your silly English K-nig-hts." my boyfriend says i'm too cynical on my blog. he says britt's is funny...which means mine ISN'T. well...some of us strive to be like her royal brittness! i'm SO sorry i can't be like her! obviously, i've failed once again. OH, HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN!? i feel so cheap and trivial; almost white trashish. (that's why i am loved) Wednesday, March 05, 2003
ALRIGHT NIKKI!!! i'm glad you turned down the job-i found out myself how much waldens cares for it's own-don't let sandi or erica tell you things to make you feel bad...they are NOT a good company to work for! you work too hard to not be appreciated. stop feeling bad about it! they should feel bad about not getting you the way they want. and HAPPY BIRTHDAY! just remember, you may be older than britt, but I'M older than you!! (shit, now I feel bad. i need a margarita!!) Monday, March 03, 2003
to the guy who slammed his six pack of busch on the counter next to me while i was paying for my gas-choke on it. to the people at TV 25 who think it's ok to air a stupid bradley basketball game and NOT law and order-you suck. not everyone likes basketball-put it on instead of those stupid infomercials you seem to love to run. to the man or woman that almost hits me at least once a week because they seem to think red for them means "don't worry about it!"-go ahead, hit me. i 'd love a new car. to the theatre in north pekin who only put one gods and generals on the schedule (its 4 hours long)-thanks for making it so EASY to see a movie! to cadbury chocolate company-thanks SO MUCH for those eggs, whether they're the little chocolate ones with the shell or the bigger ones with the soft, sugar-laden sinfully wonderfully delicious soft center-thank God they're only out for a short time for Easter! Sunday, March 02, 2003
this is a really weird night. i saw three kids rip off some beer from scnucks tonight-if i'd been thinking i could've backed my truck up and run into them-just like lethal weapon (unfortunately mel wasn't with me); people have been driving even WEIRDER than usual-almost pulling out in front of me before stopping when they have a stop sign. have you ever noticed anyone STARING at you for no reason? once in a great while i'll catch someone doing that and it makes me think i have food or some weird THING on my face. maybe they think i'm someone? as long as it's NOT someone they want to hurt! oh yeah, by the way...ALIENS HAVE LANDED...GET READY! working alone in a big building with many rooms can be creepy. i don't recomend it unless you have to (like i did saturday)-especially after i turned off the radio. soon after i could hear all sorts of little noises. the worst part was turning the light off in this big laboratory and turning my back to complete darkness, all the while imagining (just for a second or two) that someone was rushing towards me. once i even thought ...what if i looked up at that little rectangle of a window and there was a face staring in at me, smiling a creepy, toothy smile? to make it all the more enjoyable, i forgot to punch out on the computer (it was bad enough setting the alarm and hoping it was done right); i had to get back in and stand there (back to the creepy hallway, of course) and type in a couple of things. what was going thru my mind then? TYPE THIS AND THIS...WHAT WAS THAT NOISE? IT SOUNDED LIKE SOMETHING WAS TURNING ON OR TURNING OFF OR WAS THAT A SHUFFLE DOWN THE HALL? THE ALARM WAS ON WHICH MEANS NO ONE WAS HERE TIL I GOT HERE BUT THERE ARE PLENTY OF PLACES TO HIDE IF YOU WANT TO MAYBE THEY'RE JUST WAITING FOR THE RIGHT MOMENT MAYBE THEY REALIZED I CAME BACK AND WILL COME FOR ME NOW...) good nite..... Saturday, March 01, 2003
FINALLY! saturday night live is rerunning the show with RAY LIOTTA...he's finally on and all the stuff they did in skits is crap! i've been hoping for a lot of the regular stuff; why do they ALWAYS mess with a good thing? Thursday, February 27, 2003
see what working for a living does for ya-up and posting at 4:50 am-that'll happen when you accidently set your clock ahead an hour while setting the alarm. DUH on me! ATTENTION! everyone try and be nice to each other today (and every day)-all the assholes seemed to be out wed. evening (i saw two different women at the gas station about the same time. see, bitch, that dead animal on your back don't make you all that better than us!). just because one station hadn't raised the price yet, everyone and his mama was at this particular one and DAMMIT(!) they weren't gonna let anyone ahead of them. NEWSFLASH!! it's only gonna get worse-gas and oil and all that other stuff we depend on is only gonna last so long; maybe not in our lifetime, but the earth is only so big and if you keep sucking on that straw, eventually you're gonna get that annoying empty-sipping-at-the-bottom sound. (kinda like the noise britt and nik make when the captain has gone sailing for the night) DEAL WITH IT! quit blaming the government and the oil people and whoever else you want to blame for all this shit. everyone's got a part in it. now go hug your dog or cat and remember, if you're not nice to people eventually your pet will be the ONLY one to be your friend. Wednesday, February 26, 2003
"I don't know what they said; I only know that they met. What do you want me to do, kill 'em? if you want me to kill 'em, I'll kill 'em. I don't have to kill 'em, but I'd like to kill 'em...I killed Ashley Wentworth; another killing or two won't make a difference...It would make me happy...I'd like to kill 'em both...I think it'd be better if I kill 'em both...Well, let me kill just one then...Whichever one you want...Alright, I'll wait. But the minute you say kill 'em, I'll kill 'em. I'll love to kill 'em. It would give me immense pleasure." "All right, people, what are you waiting for? Breakfast in bed? Another glorious day in the corps! A day in the Marine Corps is like a day on the farm. Every meal's a banquet! Every paycheck a fortune! Every formation a parade! I LOVE the corps!" "I admire its purity, its sense of survival; unclouded by conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality." Monday, February 24, 2003
"I expect the best and I give the best. Here's the beer! Here's the entertainment! Now have fun! That's an order!" is there a chance that SOMEONE out there was watching KINGPIN and could tell me how it ended? it was on sundays and tuesdays and from what i saw it was good, but could i finish it? OH NO! senseless thoughts......... it's scary how mystery science theatre 3000 is so damn funny (even when it's just plain stupid). i think my cat wants to kill me. i have a pet spider...it lives in my walls and it's name is NOT charlotte. do you ever imagine someone or someTHING is right behind you as you start up the basement stairs and you're just waiting for that hand to grab your foot (you can't hear them or it at all!) sometimes i wish i was a drug addict so i could enjoy some really great stuff. instead, i like chocolate. (i guess that would be considered a drug, the way i eat it!) i can see the road underneath my truck from my floorboard. pretty soon it's gonna be like one of the rides at six flags! elvis is STILL dead. apparently the peoria police are searching for a murder suspect and would like the public to help, to call the phone # they supplied in a news story on the web (and affiliated with WEEK-25). funny, but since there's no picture OR no description of the guy, unless you know him personally, i doubt any of us would know the guy if he was standing in front of us (and admitted to the crime). just one more example of what a great bunch of reporters and (award-winning?) news "teams" there are in the world. file this one under "DUH", subtitled "i went to college for this and got a degree!" Sunday, February 23, 2003
aren't animals neato? chocolate? pepsi? margaritas? (bahama mamas and cpt morgan and sprite for nik and britt)? sex? cable when there's so much on you want to watch you can't decide? sleeping in on warm rainy days with the windows open and a good book beside you? sex? laughing so hard with your friend (or friends) that you almost pee your pants (britt!)? birds singing and seeming HAPPY? sex? getting crunchies with your food from LJS WITHOUT asking? an affectionate lick on your cheek from your cat or dog? don't forget the sex. i've made a few "observations" myself these past couple of days... WHY CAN'T I GET CRUNCHIES WITH MY FOOD AT LONG JOHN SILVER'S? IT'S IN THE PICTURES ON TV; THEY ACTUALLY CHARGE 15 CENTS IF YOU ASK FOR THEM BUT I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO ASK, NOW SHOULD I?! I UNDERSTAND WHAT THE WHEELCHAIR SYMBOL ON LICENSE PLATES IS FOR, BUT SHOULDN'T YOU STILL DRIVE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE...AT THE VERY LEAST THE FRIGGIN' SPEED LIMIT? I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION YOU HAD THAT SYMBOL ON THERE BECAUSE YOU GET TO PARK IN THOSE PARKING SPACES AND YOU MIGHT HAVE A MODIFIED DASHBOARD TO HELP YOU DRIVE. SO DO IT! QUIT DRIVING LIKE YOU CAN'T REACH THE PEDALS OR YOU'RE AFRAID TO ACTUALLY GET MOVING. IF YOU'RE GOING SLOWER THAN EVERYONE ELSE AND SOMEONE COMES UP BEHIND YOU AND RUNS INTO YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING SLOWER THAN EVERYONE ELSE WHEN YOU WENT AROUND THE CURVE THAT NO ONE COULD SEE THRU TO THE OTHER SIDE BECAUSE OF THE CURVE BUT SUDDENLY YOU "APPEAR" WHEN THEY COME AROUND THE CURVE AND CAN'T STOP IN TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING S-L-O-W-E-R THAN EVERYONE ELSE....DUH! WAY TO GO STUPID! GO THE SPEED LIMIT DIPSHIT! IF YOU GET PULLED OVER BY A COP AND YOU'RE PISSED OFF ABOUT IT SO YOU DECIDE TO PULL OVER ON THE SAME FUCKING ROAD THAT CARS ARE ON (INSTEAD OF ONTO A SIDE STREET OR THAT WIDE SIDE OF A ROAD THAT CARS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO DRIVE ON) BECAUSE YOU THINK "IF HE'S PULLIN' ME OVER THEN HE CAN STAND OUT THERE IN TRAFFIC 'CAUSE I'M DOING SOMETHING WRONG BUT HOW DARE HE PULL ME OVER FOR IT!"...DON'T DO THAT, DIPSHIT! I DON'T WANT TO HIT ANYBODY AND IT'S A PAIN TO AVOID BOTH OF YOU, ESPECIALLY IF TRAFFIC'S ALL OVER! note to other drivers: GET IN THE OTHER LANE WHEN SOMEONE IS ON SIDE OF THE ROAD. IT'S DANGEROUS AND YOU'RE BEING A MAJOR DICK. note to police everywhere: THOSE LIGHTS YOU USE TO ILLUMINATE THE WHOLE COUNTRYSIDE (I KNOW WHEN IT'S DARK YOU NEED THEM) BLIND ME IF I'M COMING TOWARD YOU. CAN'T YOU ADJUST THEM SOMEHOW? I'M AFRAID ONE OF THESE DAYS I'M GONNA BE BLINDED LONG ENOUGH TO HIT SOMEONE OR SOMETHING. note back to other drivers: I KNOW THERE ARE BAD DICK-COPS OUT THERE, BUT THERE ARE GOOD ONES, TOO. THEY HAVE A JOB TO DO, SO SHOW SOME RESPECT, AND IF YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING IS GONNA GET YOU IN TROUBLE AND YOU GET CAUGHT, BE AN ADULT AND DON'T BE SO SHOCKED. IF YOU HAPPEN TO GET A BAD DICK-COP, CALL SOMEONE AND GET HIM/HER IN TROUBLE (THIS IS ONLY IF THEY ABUSE THEIR JOBS, NOT BEACUSE THEY PISSED YOU OFF.) nobody wuvs me...no shout outs, no silly comebacks, and now dave -from-the-south hates me! i really SHOULD get a van down by the river! Thursday, February 20, 2003
now you just watch it there; if you're not careful, you're gonna end up like me, in a VAN down by the RIVER! Wednesday, February 19, 2003
"i don't know, sparks. but i guess i'd say if it is just us...seems like an awful waste of space." (carl sagan STILL rules) Tuesday, February 18, 2003
britt says i should talk about myself some more. i guess that makes more sense than me just starting to bitch about stuff and no one knows who i am (or supposed to be). i live in pekin, ill. (just like britt) and have worked at waldenbooks for several long years. THAT will change this sunday, my last day for good; my new job at pdc labs in peoria will be mine full time. i'm gonna miss working with britt and nik (and a few other people)-we have had some FUN! anyone who thinks a book store would be boring should work with these guys.with them it's anything but.i'm a HUGE animal lover-like diana a lot of the time i like them better than people. if anyone has a problem with that philosophy, NOT MY FAULT; TALK TO ALL THE DICKS IN THE WORLD. sure there are a lot of great people out there, but some days it seems like dicko is the only one you're running into lately.i'm always nice first, but if you are an asshole to me in any way, i can be one, too.britt and nik can vouch for me-i love to have fun with my friends (when britt gets her money and PRETENDS to like me) and i'm still learning on this machine. i'm not as funny as the little shit, i mean, uh, britt; not as cute as nikki (the only pictures you may see will be of the "kids");how sad is it when nikki can look cute WHILE she picks her nose!?! until i can get this blog to look neato like britt's and aidan's (he reminds me of an international spy for some reason! oops-please don't kill me if i'm right, aidan, i SWEAR i'm just speculating!), i'll find some more quotes (did you guess i like movies?) and various other things to bitch about. Sunday, February 16, 2003
one more day (next sunday) and then... NO MORE RETAIL, NO MORE BOOKS, NO MORE CUSTOMER'S DIRTY LOOKS. IF YOU CAN'T FIND IT, WELL,THAT'S TOO BAD. 'CAUSE LEAVING HERE, WON'T MAKE ME SAD! don't worry...my new job is NOT writing poetry! I NEED A MARGARITA!!! "and i really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking keys to a fucking car that isn't fucking there. and i really didn't care to fucking walk down a fucking highway and across a fucking runway to get back here to have you smile at my fucking face. i want...a fucking car... RIGHT...THE FUCK...NOW." Saturday, February 15, 2003
to the cilco-whatever-your-name-is-now guys who probably got paid as much TODAY as i do all week-thanks for the mess in my yard, dickheads. i appreciate your diligence in taking care of the tree situation-obviously you were acting in MY best interest. Friday, February 14, 2003
PEKIN HOSPITAL. home of the greediest bunch of DICKS in pekin. it doesn't matter that my friggin' bill was almost $10,000 after i broke my ankle. the emergency drs and nurses were GREAT...a couple of the people on the 5th floor were GREAT (although i believe the 5th floor is where they send the BAD people, cause some of them were kinda mean). my insurance paid for all but $150; i've made two monthly payments of $5 each ALONG with a note saying i would pay that once a month, so being the reputable place it is, they turn me over to a collection agency (in texas, no less)...making me feel about an inch tall and pretty much ruining my afternoon. i guess that SOMEBODY'S NOT getting paid at the hospital...i guess that $140 is just gonna break these assholes. it wasn't enough to get paid nearly $10,000-they want it ALL!! i feel so guilty, so cruel and uncaring, so...wait-NOT! UP YOURS YOU DICKS! YOU....ARE....ONLY....GETTING....$5....A....MONTH. OBVIOUSLY YOUR CAREERS IN MEDICINE (LOOK THAT WORD UP, DIPSHIT) ARE TAKING YOU FAR! i'll bet you beat kittens and small children on the weekends. you think EVERYONE's out to cheat you; if they are you probably DESERVE to be cheated! you better hope YOU don't get into that situation; you WON'T like it. Thursday, February 13, 2003
ALERT! ALERT! the f.b.i. has leads on several al queda (did i spell it right? wouldn't want to offend the little dicks- HA!-i'll bet THAT'S true!) gomers in the country and is debating on whether they should arrest them...maybe the press and the f.b.i. SHOULDN'T SAY ANYTHING...make it a SURPRISE? see, that way, they just might get caught. that way, the bad guys might FINALLY get arrested...put away...sent to the big house...hopefully get an ass whippin', too. maybe they should CALL first, make sure it's ok to come over...DUH. maybe the press should back off and do their job...it's called NEWS, chicken little. you guys would get the world into a wild frenzy over ANYTHING you could find, just to sell a paper. the sky isn't always falling and sometimes, thank goodness, GOOD things happen, too! Wednesday, February 12, 2003
oh...my...GAWD!!! just got the OFFICIAL e-mail...i could be the next winner of 100 million trillion billion dollars! all i have to do is fill out a bunch of SHIT! HEY! here's a thought...hows 'bout you just give me my money, and i'll buy a BUNCH of your friggin' magazines! here's another thing, i won't complain about the taxes! the way i see it is, i didn't have the million trillion billion to start with, and, even if you take HALF, that's STILL half of a million trillion billion, which makes it, what, just a billion? BRING IT ON!! so what did we LEARN this day? and what will we DO with what we've learned? and just WHAT was nikki doing in her car when that picture was taken? oooh!oooh! saw this nice lookin' guy driving down the highway in his big-ass truck the other day...(you KNOW what they say about a guy with a big-ass truck!?). anyway he was sooo cool; like a commercial for big-ass trucks! suddenly, there's his hand through his window (it was rolled down) and what did i see, a big piece of PAPER! there goes your coolness rating, lone ranger! you are now offically known as THE BIG-ASS ASS! what the f***k are you thinking? are you so closed minded that you don't THINK (look it up) that ANY of your actions affect anyone else? boy you're SO RIGHT there! i have always LOVED seeing garbage in my yard because people like YOU are too lazy to PUT IT IN A BAG UNTIL YOU CAN GET TO A GARBAGE CAN. honey, please don't even TRY to tell me you vehicle is clean and you don't want that shit in it. that goes for the occasional moron that walks down the street (namely mine) and throws down the can of soda or empty bag from hardees ("golly, i didn't know i'm not 'sposed to not do that" he says as he "scratches"....) now could this be rule #5? don't litter? DON'T LITTER!! why you ask? it 's not MY problem, you say? that's as bad as the "it's not MY fault he's getting all those dogs pregnant; they should be spayed! my dog ain't poppin' out litters!" (this guy can usually be seen on the jerry springer show late at night, telling the whole world he's in love with his momma's sister's doctor's wife's brother's pit bull). DON'T LITTER! GARBAGE CAN! HEFTY CINCH-SAK! RECYCLE RECYCLE RECYCLE!! now what was my point? HEY! WHY CAN'T...jon bon jovi and john cougar (or john cougar mellencamp or john mellencamp) tour together; it would be called the "ROCKIN' ASS!!" tour... HEY! WHY CAN"T...my paycheck be bigger...($-wise, not length-wise)... (although length is somewhat important) HEY! WHY CAN'T...i look like someone jon or john would hang out with... HEY! WHY CAN'T...my boyfriend find a way to LEGALLY hurt his boss (and various other dicks he works with) financially (OUCH!) and, oh yes, a couple of them physically (leaving no permanent damage, whether it be physical or emotional)... HEY! WHY CAN'T...the politicians in this world of ours just TRY to look at "it" reasonably; "it" is anything that OBVIOUSLY is a danger to people or to the environment (guess what...THAT will someday lead to PEOPLE). i don't consider myself a tree hugger; just because i'd rather enjoy a nice sunset with trees or a lake in front of me instead of spending my time with the "beautiful people" doesn't mean i'm uneducated. it must be rough spending all that time at the country club or shopping with the hubby's (and in some cases, i'm sure, the wife's) american express, only to be SO HARRIED that you just can't make that dinner party; why DO they have to have that damn thing in the bahamas EVERY F****N' YEAR!? why should you worry about clean air or clean water or whether there's any more howler monkeys left? it's not like they WORK for you; there's bottled water and canned air, so why worry? oh, to hell with it...next time i take a walk in the woods, i just may hug a tree after all...while i still can! HEY!! PEACE!! Sunday, February 09, 2003
note to the bible people-when getting out of church where you've prayed and given money and joined your fellow man in a loving (some of you need to look that word up) atmosphere-GOD SAYS IT'S OK TO STILL BE THAT LOVING, KIND (look that up too) HUMANITARIAN (must i say it?). note to the disney lovers-DISNEY IS DEAD. just like elvis, he was a PERSON. mickey mouse is MADE UP. he was NOT REAL. i'm sorry to burst your bubble, but there ARE other neato parks to go to that have rides and stuff like that. if disney's people REALLY wanted you there because they love having you blah blah blah it wouldn't be so freakin' expensive! they love having your MONEY. YOUR MONEY...YOUR MONEY MAKES THEIR WORLD GO 'ROUND. it's not a small world after all, is it? LET IT BE KNOWN...PEOPLE SHOULD THINK BEFORE THEY HAVE CHILDREN!! are you REALLY going to be a good parent? this DOES include (but not limited to)...making the kid MIND YOU...be POLITE...no TEMPER TANTRUMS OR YOU'RE GONNA GET A BEATIN'!!...DON'T TOUCH...no talking back or YOU"RE GONNA GET A BEATIN'!!...if you do touch, PUT IT BACK or let ME give you a BEATIN'!! an occaisional hug and "i love you " is definitely required, but there still may be a BEATIN' that is needed. oh, yeah, if the teacher or cops call and say your kid did it, then he/she did it! stop acting like your kid NEVER does anything wrong and everyone around you is against the little shit. it's called denial...watch the Shawshank Redemption; maybe THEN you'll get YOUR shit together and fix it BEFORE it happens! Saturday, February 08, 2003
this freakin computer is driving me crazy!! i had several paragraphs POSTED but not yet entered on blog-error page came up and it was GONE! maybe i should consider this a sign-i wrote CRAP! (it wasn't scottish) signs...maybe they're from aliens-oooh, where's mel? or even joaquin? i'm not drunk OR high-i just play one when i can. read britt's blog today...careful britt, or you're gonna end up in a "van down by the river!" at the risk of sounding like a cynical, whiney bitch...people suck. not all of them; actually, there are more nice people than there are sucky people. the sucky people suck. that's why they're called sucky people. are YOU a sucky person? if you are, get help IMMEDIATELY!!! no one likes you, and if something ever happens to you, no one cares. learn to be nice or you may wind up ALONE and STUPIDLY SUCKY. stop being mean to animals and small children, stop hogging the road AND that pain-in-the-ass skinny aisle in wal mart, and stop being a rude pain-in-the-ass customer everywhere else. oh, yeah...tip your waiter/waitress...they weren't put on this earth to make sure your coffee cup is always full (which you drink as you bitch about how cold it is). try it. went to bloomington this evening. HEY!! Lane trucker...it's called a TURN SIGNAL...use it! freakin' goober gives truckers a bad name w/shit like that. also the bimbo at the tremont citgo in the real purty green ta or camaro (whatever) that her daddy gave her (had one of those stupid license plates little rich girls like to put on their car-THKS DADY-or something like it)-WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING YOU STUPID BITCH! you never even looked at me after you almost hit me! go ahead, i want a new car! is it a full moon tonight? it's true what they say-the full moon makes people act strange. next one we have pay a little more attention to those around you. stay inside. lock your doors. Wednesday, February 05, 2003
DON'T YOU JUST HATE...that stupid commercial about hardee's burgers where people are sitting in chairs talking about hardee's burgers? DON"T YOU JUST HATE...those stupid commercials about GIRLS GONE WILD!!? what about GUYS GONE WILD!!? let's see some of THAT. oh, i forgot...they're all on the GIRLS GO WILD!! tape. they're the ones that will have they're own tape called GUYS THINK THEY"RE GETTING LUCKY BUT ONLY RACKING UP THE EVIDENCE SO THE WIFE CAN GET EVERYTHING IN THE DIVORCE!! DON'T YOU JUST HATE...the fact that it takes britt DAYS to post one of her "lists"? more later........... Tuesday, February 04, 2003
ok ok ok. i guess you have these guys at work no matter WHAT the job! my job at the lab includes cleaning glassware. i'm supposed to do about 4 hours of it before i can do MY stuff. as usual, there are those who think MY JOB is to be there for THEM. i'll bend over backwards to help you if you ask and say such strange little words as "please" and "thank you"...BUT...if you have a hard time being human ("ouch...dat hurts me"), then i'm going to have an attitude with you. SO...rule # 4 is the same as rule # 1-MANNERS! look it up in the dictionary if need be...stop being a dick! one of these days all the people who have been shit on may decide ENOUGH and "take out" (britt's) the next offender. you never know...you may find yourself on an episode of the Twilight Zone... Monday, February 03, 2003
Sunday, February 02, 2003
WHY...does blogger ALWAYS ask me to sign in even tho i checked the "remember me" box? WHY...do i lose all my text for posting unless i right click and save? WHERE...can I find a doggie parka like pheobis' big enough for fed (preferably in fuscia) HOW...can i become a snobby actress like britt?(when you get a part w/ray, i expect to be called BEFORE, not after...free movie tickets, also). WHY...do some people not appreciate it when i'm nice to them...and why can't i hurt them for it? WHY...does britt have it in for the local police...and how can we use that to our benefit? WHEN...will it snow again? ...a lot. ...say...at least 10 feet? shut up, you weinie! this ain't florida!! another day at the bookstore-another day of NOT knowing what you want, where your toddler is putting that f****n book he's been messing up for the last 10 minutes(!), and, oh YEAH, NOT doing the reading assignment your teacher gave you-guess what-CLIFF NOTES ARE GOING TO GET YOU IN TROUBLE! why spend money for school if you're gonna cheat? SHIT- i forgot about that "ry-chis pardy, dude". i guess i'm jealous 'cause mummy and daddy didn't send me to college. i have to PAY for mine! britt-DO THE BARBIE THING!! DO THE BARBIE THING!! had a great time with britt and nikki yesterday. met at applebees for a while, then a late movie (darkness falls). it was scary in parts, but boy, britt sure does scare easily. the best part was all the laughing we did all day. just had a wonderful time (although britt has issues with cops-jeez we're lucky we didn't have to bail her out of jail!! she fights authority, authority always will!) thanks you two for a great time! oh, yeah-cool song-i will always think of that as britt's theme song-EH! Saturday, February 01, 2003
what a crappy way to wake up on a sleep-in-saturday.now all the rumors will start-doesn't help with people like that bimbo on the news this morning who called in to say how beautiful it was the way everyone got more info thru those phone calls than the news itself. LAY OFF THE BONG WATER!! i'm inclined to believe that things DO wear out and accidents DO happen-that shuttle had a lot of miles on it-(i hope it was super quick for them). unfortunately there are those that think we spend too much money on the space program-besides, we're the ONLY ones here in this universe, right? DUH!! if you believe that i feel for you. why would they want to come to this playground when we can't play fair with each other AND we keep fucking up our resources? anyway, lets be thankful for how lucky we are and say a little prayer for those whoo need it. Friday, January 31, 2003
quick note: to all of you out there who have some authority over others-guess what...you AREN'T given some divine right to rule over others. you are an employee like the others, unless you HAPPEN to own your own business. be grateful or you just may have to do it all yourself. if you HAVE to do the nepotism thing, just remember...your relative (father-son seems to be the "in" thing) may get his/her ass kicked when the masses decide they have had enough of junior's three hour lunches, "sick" days because laundry wasn't done, or OUTRAGEOUS quantities of money for a job NOT done. so rule #3-don't be a dick or you may be a dick out of business! and who wants to be a businessless dick? hey! to the guy in the white grand am driving WITHOUT your f****n lights on IN the fog...i could sure use a new vehicle you BUTT! you AREN'T the next nascar king so WATCH IT!! oooohh sometimes a cop REALLY has to enjoy the job! "my ride is here. it looks like a huff; i think i'll leave in it." don't ya sometimes feel like saying silly things? if you do it enough you won't have to worry about people bothering you-an occasional talking-to-empty space REALLY keeps 'em away, right nik??? Thursday, January 30, 2003
"it vexes me, i'm terribly vexed"........what we all say after britt colors her hair.(i like it-especially the green!) ha!!! very funny nikki-that freaky web site you sent me to just about killed me! i was really getting into that test AND i happened to have the sound up-OUCH! i may have nightmares! p.s. to britt-my cousin jerri wanted to know if ray really sent me that post-if only it were true! what a twisted fantasy THAT would be!! that isn't quite the way i'd like it-right word, wrong way of getting it! another day at work, a dollar closer to CLOSURE! you know, when bills are PAID!! unfortunately, that ain't happening for a while! anyway, after a visit to Wally World, i've decided my second rule of life is...BIRTH CONTROL! there are several ways to go about it, pills, iud, RUBBERS! it's not so much i don't like kids as the parents that can't control them. although there are a few teens out there with kids, there's also the older, supposedly WISER adults bitching at the screamer while making everyone around them miserable. try reading about, you know, the "s" word. try talking to someone you trust, especially the one you're gonna "do it" with. i realize accidents happen, but twice? three times? now you're a business venture! STOP IT! if you have babies to get money from the government YOU ARE A LOSER! and whatever you do, don't mistreat the kid. someone just may see it and kick your pathetic ass, just to see how YOU like it! one more thing, there are girls out there who give it up to anyone (slut, ho, etc.)...if a guy does the same he IS the same, so cut the double standard shit! see what shopping at wal-mart does for your stae of mind? (brought to you by URGA-United Rubber Growers Association)-hehehe Wednesday, January 29, 2003
hey...this really IS kim; britt did the first one. she helped me set this up...actually she did ALL of it...i stink at computer stuff. anyhoo, i'm from pekin, ill, also known as "what color are you...you're NOT welcome here" usa, and I have a cat that ALWAYS looks stoned out of his mind.occasionally, whenever i post something, i'm going to regale you with a "rule of life." and now...i present to you...my FIRST rule on my brand new blog... 1) unless you were raised by People-Without-Shame (homo ignoramus) and never taught any manners, "please" and "thank you" are all the rage now! it IS socially acceptable and widely used everywhere. it's painless, odorless (at least for most of us) and it's FREE!! as for the turbo-christians, STOP going to church on Sunday mornings PRAISE THE LORD!! only to become an ASS in the afternoon. the only ass in the Bible had four legs (not two) and was a popular means of transportation. so there...HA! p.s. britt stinks more, MUCH MORE!! |
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